Peace In Our Hearts!

How can we have peace of mind

When there's non in our hearts? 

How do we understand ourselves

When we're afraid to seek God?

   If we don't go to God where

Do we go now? 

   

We're afraid of our tears but,

We try to heal the world. 

There's too many who 

Claim to have peace but, 

Never had my God or even 

A God in their lives. 

 Where do we go now?

Is it the Devil's win? Or 

Is this a journey for all of 

Us? 

   I stand and admit I 

Don't have a understanding 

Of my own walls that are not

Yet stone but, are tall 

Enough to cut my view of

My prizes. 

   Where can I buy this 

peace on earth? I'm not

Sure of where God is in 

My life. Too many

Talk about it but, not 

Many are declared righteous 

By it.

    How can we have peace

Of mind when there's non 

In our hearts? Where do

We go now? 

   Is this our battle to

Fight? Can finding 

Peace help up concur our

Fears?  

The Good Of Me

I wish I could just crawl

Inside my shell & convince 

Me that I'm pretty. 

   I wish rain didn't 

Knock upside my window cause

I'm convinced it's Gods cry.

I guess that's why it's

Called window pain. 

My head is always down 

cause I never

Knew of a such thing as 

Confidence, I guess the

Idea of that was completely 

insane. 

If I had confidence the 

World swore up and down

That I was conceded but,

   I heard through the 

grapevine that my being 

Is  beautiful but;

I wish my heart would tell me

that. I'm not sure 

how long I'll allow myself 

to be susceptible to

the cat calls & whispers but,

My body's hallow, no sure 

of how to pick my battles;

I'd just rather not fight. 

   I've been okay with

Loosing far too long and

I'm not sure why I picked 

Today to win when yesterday

Was my first option. How about

I choose tomorrow? I know

It's not promised but, winning

Is still no guarantee. 

    I'm lost within myself. 

My mother swears I'm

My father but, my father is

Like God. I don't see him but,

I know he exist. I'm failing 

because I'm holding faith

In my hand but, I can't 

Find the direction to my heart. 

     This drug is a coping mechanism.

Roll my blunts & inhale the 

Venom, the pungent smell

Of disaster is the devils 

Play mate. Playing chess 

with my soul like he's 

already won. Check Mate. 

Lash my soul with 

Sinners but, you will not 

create a master piece out

Of me. 

     This poem is my souls 

Song to the heavens asking 

God is there still room for me. 

Cause my being should be for

The good of me. 

Early Morning But Happy Blue's

You get me like curly hair
Gets resealed in the wind.
Like Barbie gets Ken
Like red is to roses
And like black is to funerals.

I love you like white on
Rice & sugar is to spice.
Our souls interlock like
The fingers of a kindergartner
And her Mother on the
First day of school.

We were as sinful as
Satin in the rain that one
Night. Our lips kissed like
Poetry in "Love Jones"
And our hands touched
Unmentionables to
satisfaction but, the pleasure
Goes unspoken.

Our love is kool. Not like
Ice but, like ice cream
Cones on hot southern
Sunday nights.

We were kool.
Kool enough to laugh
At each other &
Kool enough to cuddle
Close together & locked
Fantasies in ecstasy
Until the both of us
Could Cum Just
you and me.

No expiration dates
Or expectations
We just took what we
could get and lived off
Of that.

And that was enough to
Get us through the
Month like food stamps
And blunts. That was
Just enough to get
Us through the month.

Someone's something

Your voice sings songs to
my soul that I thought only
God could perfect.

And your fingers read my body
Like books Shake Sphere has
Written.

But, I was always afraid that your
Being was too cool to
Love my being so honestly, I was
Never really honestly lovin' myself.

And the thought for you to love
Me back was crazy.

I always fell victim to your touch
From navel up I was your's but, you,
You were never really mine.

You were too busy being
Someone else's everything while
All of me to you was nothing.

In my room we laid.

Made love to dead feelings
and I master bated to the memory's
Of your voice and I re-felt every
Single touch from navel up,
I was your's in body

But never in spirit 'cause all
Of me to you was nothing.

I thought that in you I saw beauty
But, when you brought the drugs
I brought the pain.

And no one ever told us that
Beauty was pain's lover.

And Disney never prepared
Us for what's after the glass slipper,
And all I had was the weekend to get
high for this song you sung to
My soul.

My body use to be gold.
I gave you all of this, from
Navel up I fell victim to your touch.

I gave you all of me but,
all of Me was nothing because
You were too busy being someone
Else's something.

All of me was nothing.

You had me dancing so long to
this song I had started dancing
with the devil.

I gave you all of this and my world.

Bring the drugs baby,
I can bring my pain.

I brought my love and I see
You brought your game.
Got me dancing on a new level,
Got me dancing with the devil.

I gave you all of this and
All of this was my love but,
From navel up falling victim
To your superficial touch;
All of this was nothing and you,
You were someone else's something.

Death, I miss you!

Death as in you're not here.

Deaf as in I can no longer listen to your heart beat.

Death as in you're no longer here.
But I swear in my heart I always got you.

I got you in Mind, Picture and Spirit, not body
because for as long as I shall live,
nobody can replace the body
I hugged, loved and curled up under on the
Pew in sunday school.

New school, old school, hey how's heavens school?
Are the work sheets lined with gold
and do you have a picture with God yet?

After 3years I'm still not sure how
I'm suppose to deal with your death.
Death as in you're not here.
Deaf as in I can't hear you
Scream, Scriptures, Scrapping
them from the bible.

I wasn't your GrandChild
but, I treated and loved you like
my GrandMother.
Y'all were best friends. You know,
I often catch her tears in my palms and
Wash my face with them.
Her longing for you made
me pray even
Harder that God will allow
post cards from heaven.

Death as in you're not here.

Deaf as in I can't listen to you sing in
the morning.

Death as in I'm missing you.

Deaf as in I don't want to hear my
Own voice cause, I still hear
the hallow that whistles from when
I lost you.
Death as in I miss you.
Grandmother I miss you.